Explanations, musings, and some of the same old shit...

Ok... so... it appears some explanations are required for those of you who do not know me that well and get my terminology and sense of humour. For those of you that do, you can skip down to below the picture of me in front of a bonfire and continue from there, this has the potential to be lengthy... Mostly this is for Spanky, for even though she likes Twilight (which will be referred in the future as Twatlight), she is still a hip cat but there may be more like her and especially new readers may want to peruse this section before diving in head first to the rest of my twisted world and paranoid ramblings:)

I will try to answer/reply to your questions and comments as well as explain my self to you, so here goes...

I ended up on your blog randomly, not exactly sure how, but something caught my eye as I was wandering around the inter-web. I try to get other people perspectives and thoughts on things in general as well as see how different pages look and how to make mine look better and hopefully attract new readers. My goal over all with this is to vent first and foremost, second to get a laugh or at least amuse those who stop by and third to hopefully assimilate better writing skills. I also use this as another avenue to talk about my bands when they are doing things, but am contemplating a separate blog for that as it will mostly be fliers for shows and things of that nature. Just because we do not see eye to eye on everything and agree on everything does not mean we can't get a kick out of each others sites and all that jive. Most people who read this probably think I am bat-shit crazy and should be locked away from sharp objects and the general public:) Some of you are just as fucked up as I am.

I do swear a lot, 90% of the time I write this blog when I am pretty worked up and usually more than a little drunk. I assemble my rants and just let it fly because I do not have the chance to in the people world most of the time, I try to make it funny when I can, however, sometimes I just get going and need to vent my face off and blow off some steam. I usually make an attempt to keep the vulgarities to a minimum unless I am just completely livid.

I did not mean to come across as belittling religious cats, I used to be, not so much anymore. Seems silly to me on most levels, but most of my friends are religious in one form or another and we chat and debate about it. I served 7 years in the Marines so people can believe what ever they want. that being said, I also have my own opinions about the matter and am able to take a joke in the same regard. There will always be someone telling you your belief is wrong, I will try not to because I don't really know if it is or not, the most optimistic probability you can assign to any set of beliefs about all that jive is .5 In the end, no one knows what is and isn't because none of us have ever been there in the here after if it exists. I will make an occasional joke about religion and people can joke about my lack of a choice in one or the lack of a decision to become an atheist. I am open to discussion and debate and learning new things, just don't force yours upon me and I will reciprocate.

It's not my fault your a dirty hippie (kidding :-P ) I don't have a problem with hippies, I just like the word and it is about the only thing you can call someone without being sued these days. I am even part hippie myself, I think it is my esophagus, lower intestine, and right leg. I am a supporter of peace on earth and all that rubbish, not very optimistic about it, but do dig the idea. The love thing is another issue, there are things that are tangible in life I do love, like my drumming, Family Guy, my cat, things of that nature. As far as the love thing goes for people and relationships, the jury is still out on that one. Seems to be almost more of a symbiotic relationship of sorts. My quote/thought on the issue as of late seems to follow this thought strain... It's just finding a brand of crazy you can put up with, and one that can stand to be around you and your bull shit. I say again, I am open to debate and rethinking the matter, but that is my current opinion, however "Semper Gumbi" is the motto to live by for me these days, things change, viewpoints change, that comes from learning and living. I also shower daily, usually two or three times due to my bands and gigs and all that rot.

Honest and sincere people are hard to come by these days, the two other people who read this and comment are in this category, you are placed there as well, Spanky. I appreciate it and welcome it and look forward to commenting back and forth and debating things with you, you are an eloquent writer and seem to have some interesting things going on in that brain housing group of yours. I will quote the Southwest Airlines commercial I get suck a kick out of to close this section... "Grab your bag... it's on!

Welcome back dear reader, this will be my second sober post ever of the 26 I believe that are on here, buggered on coffee but went to bed too early and have been up since 4am and on the caffeine since 0530, current time stamp is 0846. Headed upstairs to take the picture for Red and V, one of you cats has to tell me how to make your name a clickable link to your blog. Also have to start another pot of happy juice, go grab a smoke and I'll probably be back when you are:)

Ok, first off let me apologize for the lack of a hair cut and the piercing's, I have been out for some time now, but it still fits like a fucking glove! I also am working on a beard for the winter, not sure yet if I am going to keep it up or just go back to the goatee. The pic was taken on my phone as I lack a camera, but thats me in uniform...

Now I have some ideas once in a while, and sometimes even go as far as to try to implement them, one of my latest is a dear Abbey thing, only I tell you how to tell that special person in your life exactly what you think of them and how to tell them to pound sand, or at least listen to your bitching and offer advice, sometimes I can honestly help out and telling the person to fornicate them selves with a rusted railroad spike is not always the correct avenue of approach. I would like to call this section Blunt Force Drama. Not sure if I am going to do it or if anyone would even ask me for my opinion, but if I get question's, I will do a section at the end of every blog with the questions and answers. My own love life may be a disaster and retarded from the outside, however I have saved a few relationships of others, and helped a few people to get out of bad situations.

(This is my fav pic from the last DisplaceD show, www.myspace.com/displaced)

I am filling in for a friends band tonight at a show, they currently lack a drummer. (Anyone wants more info email me, klhammerick@gmail.com) The name if the band is 240 North and they are a rock 'n roll/blues ish kind of band. Good tunes and fun to play, I did my first jam with them to learn the tunes last Friday. the tunes were easy for me to learn, and only a couple of snags, it's a style I used to play a lot of and is easy once the basic structure is down. We had a lot of fun and got haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaammered on beer and whiskey and even after all that, they still offered me the gig full time on the spot, after never hearing their tunes before and playing them wasted. I regretfully have to turn them down as I am already in two bands, working full time, and will be back in school in January. Wish I had the time for it, they are hip cats and have some good tunes. Playing a double header gig tonight with them (Sat, 28 Nov) at a place in Buffalo called Club Diablo, I play in the second band which is the 240 cats, then my 90's grunge cover band, Zazz Blammymatazz plays for another hour or so. If anyone is in the area and wants to stop by, hit me up at the above email address. I have one of those witchcraft phones that does all that hippie jive on it. It's cool to be in demand as a drummer, the open mic my cover band hosts has a couple other groups that want me to drum for them as well, I can at open mic because I am already there, but if they all had their way, I would be playing every Tue from 7:30 till 4:00 the next morning and that would suck when I have to be at work at 7 am. I try to do as much as I can, and feel bad when I can't help the other dude's out, but I am only one little cracker and only have so much time on my hands. No matter what city you live in though, go check out some of the local bands of whatever genre you dig, we bust our asses to bring good tunes to the public and good performance, money isn't a big deal, we are much happier when people are dancing or watching us play and having a good time. Us musicians love to meet new people and network and even have a few beers now and again with out patrons, always looking for new fans and friends.

Anyone ever dump someone and then a few hours/days/or even in the same conversation they turn it to make it them dumping you instead? I get a particularly good giggle out of that and it is one of the things that interests me in psychology. I don't know sex about shit when it comes to psych, but I do know that everyone needs to be the hero in their own story and some people just can't deal with rejection and have to rationalize things just so they can get out of bed in the morning. I will admit I have done this before, sometimes it helps getting over a particularly bad relationship, but I still don't let me lie to myself. Short term feel goods help sometimes, but I always remember what happened and try to learn from it as to not repeat the same mistakes further down the line. Damn that sounds good on paper, I could be better at that than I actually am, put that one on the list...

I also have an idea for a new super hero, some of the more memorable ex girlfriends, are usually the basis of this, it keeps me sane and makes me smile. Some of you should get a giggle out of it as well I hope. My favourite one to date is still Cokey the Wunderlush. This heroine has the amazing ability to do more blow than can be stored in a pick up truck bed and wash it down with a couple cases of beer and not eat or sleep for days on end. She was a gifted story teller and could be seen saving the world from cocaine by doing it all before anyone else could get any. (I don't do coke by the way, did once, never again, it was pointless and it's expensive. I stick to booze and cigg's.) Alcoholic by day and coke binger by night, this fair maiden could regenerate nose cartilage by the square foot it seemed, surely an admirable trait... She also sometimes didn't have money for said fun having accessories, but that is no match for a super hero such as this, he could fuck ANYthing to get more, so I found out after we had broken up...

The newest one is a lesser known and not quite as active hero. Still working on it, but I have a decent start. Pale as death and sketchy as Picasso, The Flake brings emotional wreckage and drama to a whole new terrifying level, be warned evil doers, one encounter with this frosty lass will surely put you in a state of confusion and self loathing. Able to ignore any situation for months on end and able to concoct the most mind numbing stories that ride the border of fact and fiction so closely, the two cannot be separated with the finest of knives. This heroine even comes equipped with camouflage (freckles) to blend in amongst the masses. A crafty and cunning linguist (no lesbian joke, honest, don't think is a switch hitter) she has the ability to barter for anything she needs from anyone she needs it from. And the best part? You get nothing in return! Ever!! Win Win situation for everyone, and by everyone, I mean that with all applicable sarcasm... Needs revision and to be not quite so bitter, but I will revise:)

I do not like how men seem to be portrayed on television these days, or couples in general. I do agree it is about time that women are portrayed in a good light, not as stupid door mat's and housewives, but can't both people be honest and hard working? Does one always have to be fat and stupid? Now I do agree that there are far more fat, stupid, mouth breathing half wits out there, especially in this country, however, not everyone is like that. Not every relationship has cheating in it (I hope) or one person always beating the other down and ridiculing them. I do get a chuckle out of some of these shows, but it is going too far. King of Queens, Simpsons, and Family Guy are perfect examples of this. The dude in the show is fat, stupid, and a pussy. Careless and in the latter of the two doesn't give two shit about his mate most of the time. I think this is kind of fucked up. What ever happened to two cats diggin each other and god forbid helping each other out and being nice to and there for each other? Is that an old fashioned view point? No wonder the divorce rate is so high these days...

For all you homeopathic medicine people out there... I try like hell to stay away from politics, religion, and beliefs here, I feel we should be here to be friendly, honest, and not to start wars... but, I feel this fad has been de bunked, at least it has been well enough for me. My point here is slightly more comical though I hope. I have a better solution for all of you that buy these colon cleansing products that create the problem they claim to solve. (Really, read the ingredients, some are made from something akin to cat litter...) My solution is easier, cheaper, and a lot more fun. Eat some good and hot ass chili and maybe even some Taco Bell or Jim's Steak-out (local sub place in B-lo) and in the morning, have a couple cups of some strong, dark coffee along with a couple smokes. Have faith fair citizens, this will purge your system from the freakin eyeballs down and you'll lose about 5 pounds by the time you have left the loo, may be more than one trip, but screw it, it's Saturday morning, you have better plans?

So this chick that is supposed to be my new girlfriend of sorts I guess is being very scarce, when I am nice and try to be there and helpful, she doesn't respond, when I finally get pissed and send a scathing message since she won't respond to text's and sends call's to voicemail prematurely, (yes people know when you do it so stop it everyone. Just hit the volume button to silence the ringer, not the end button to send to voicemail, then we know your being a dick) thats when I get a response, then we talk a bit then the next day I try to be nice or supportive and the cycle begins again. Haven't had a real conversation with her in about a week, haven't even seen her in two. Now I am famous for over analyzing things and being paranoid and figuring the worst will usually happen, but there is still a chance I am just too paranoid and need to relax and she really does need some time to sort things out and sometimes want a couple days with out me bugging her. But, for the sake of everything holy, don't make a huge deal that I call you the next day and then you ignore me for two days, that just seems silly to me. If your not diggin it, just say so, simple solution to a simple problem. If you are busy or depressed or whatever, it still isn't too much to ask to take 10 seconds away from everything and shoot a quick text to say your busy or whatever, after all you have plenty of time to fart around on facebook and buy weed and booze for your sister and her friends and "not do it with them" and "be sitting alone in your room all the time". It's been two weeks, and if I may be so vulgar as to say, daddy is feeling kinda froggy, don't make the purchase of the clown mask and the can of crisco go to waste. I would like to think that she is not out there being the star of the new bukake film or trying to set a personal record for most cats shagged in a weekend, however (extreme, yes I know just making a point.) sometimes I wonder, I know the company she seems to keep on a regular basis, and if you show me your friends, I'll tell you a few things about yourself.

This has gone on long enough, probably too long I fear, hope I have not bored you all. Have a good and safe weekend and don't be a dick.

Yours from the bat cave,

The bitter Jarhead

:-P